week one vent

Having a second baby is so different than I expected it to be.

Ellie seems to be an incredibly "easy" baby. She sleeps very well and cries very little. I really wonder how much of this is due to an actual personality difference, how much is due to our being more experienced parents, and how much is due to our perceptions of "easy"/"difficult" having changed over the past two years. Really, the hardest part of this is dealing with Tristan.

Of course, he decided that this past week would be the week he'd give up afternoon naps. An exhausted toddler is much more challenging than a rested one, and add a new baby (and therefore less attention), and it's disasterous. I'd thought I had discipline figured out with him; he was always quite well behaved. He's on my last nerve most of the time now. Screaming, throwing, running, pinching my belly flab...it's awful. I have plenty of energy for Ellie, but not for Ellie, myself, and a too-rough boy. I'm so glad that Jon's home right now.

I've recovered really well physically---lochia is almost over already, bad engorgment only lasted a day, no discomfort getting around, etc. That's really a mixed blessing, I decided last night. I really have been taking things too quickly, more quickly than I am emotionally or mentally prepared for. I am going to make an effort to slow down and try to enjoy the kids.